Leprechaun 5: In The Hood

I’m about to possibly sound racist from the very beginning of this blog post, but I found Leprechaun 5: In the Hood to be hilarious. I know its marketed as a horror comedy, but they should have more clearly defined it as a black horror comedy for black people. Or maybe more to the point that its a comedy that sensationalizes the thug life of black people in the 90’s. I really don’t know how to classify this movie myself. Let’s just get on with it…

This is a movie all about how three rappers got their lives turned upside down. They got in a fight with a leprechaun and their blind moms wasn’t spared. There’s a flute and some crazy ass-lines without care. There, rap schpeel over.  This movie attacks the African American street community from all angles. It is absolutely absurd. It doesn’t care what stereotypes it digs up. It makes stereotypes out of thin air. Who knew every damn black person who

Three posers.

picks up a flute can play a little diddy? I didn’t! And know I do! And the more you know the more you grow and that’s half the battle!

So this movie starts out with three true O.G.’s (original gangsters for the layperson) named Postmaster P. (Anthony Montgomery), Stray Bullet (Rashaan Nall), and Butch (Red Grant). Butch lays down all kinds of beats and is accused of being stupid and a virgin. Apparently, if you don’t have sex and you’re a young African American whippersnapper, everyone in your community will know about it. And that’s a damn fact. These guys destroyed their sound equipment because Butch and his ingenious thoughts told him to create a chemical factory on his turntables. Nice one there Mutumbo. In desperate need of cash to fulfill their dreams of rap stardom that will begin in Las Vegas, these three go out to case a joint.

That bat... came from his fro...

And who do they decide to knock over? Ice T, A.K.A., Mack Daddy O’Nassas. In an earlier scrape with the Leprechaun (Warwick Davis), O’Nassas found himself toe-to-toe with someone who could never truly play basketball. An Earl Boykins, if you will. With dope rhymes and insane powers to force your hands to drop any weapon, it seemed as if Ice T was doomed. And then, after going through a gun, knife, and mini baseball bat all stored in his afro, Ice T caught his break. A necklace that encases the Leprechaun in stone is launched onto his neck. Leaving him free to make his jive-ass famous, Ice T makes himself a rap mogul with his own recording label.

Davis hittin' that hard blunt.

Many years pass and the three young punks from the bad part of town show up and promote their fresh new look at rap. The positivity that comes with good thoughts and working together. But, in what I can only describe as ridiculousness, Ice T denies this positive turn on rap and says, “We have to rap about capping our homies in the face and smackin’ up a bitch and hoe.” As much as I do that in my daily life, what’s so wrong rapping positively? It may stop a bit of violence here or there. Some special commentary right there.

So the dope trio unleashes the beast and a wild goose chase ensues. O’Nassas is after their black asses (Geez, can I rap?) and the Leprechaun is hot on their tails like Southern Fried Molasses. Word. Can’t get enough? There’s more.

The Leprechaun's zombie hoes.

These three try to con some whack black pawn dealer named Jackie Dee (Dan Martin). This guy loves his biatches and that becomes the end of him. Any person these guys interact with have to bite the bullet. Even poor old Mr. Chang (throw some Asian racism in there for good measure). Postmaster’s blind mamma gets roped in and the best scene! The Leprechaun gets jiggy with a tranny. And bangs him/her to death? I think?!? It’s all kinds of insanity. And Butch wanted some of that beefcake…

Yes. The lines.

AND THE LINES. Oh, the lines. Every limerick spewed from Warwick Davis’s mouth is pure genius. Here’s a little taste/ad lib. Come here my sweet lass, sit on my lap. Let me look at you, before I give your sweet ass a tap. That made me lose it right there. I give props to Warwick Davis. For someone who went into this movie knowing he’d be hitting some fat blunts, rollin’ hard on some sad-ass thugs, and banging some strange hoes, he stone faced it like a champ. Even Ice T, strange actor and angry man that he is, must have known this could have been a career breaker if it hadn’t been pulled off comedically enough.

So all hell breaks loose, Leprechaun raises some beat ass zombie sluts from the beyond, and two masculine black gangsters dress up in drag, and somehow fool the Leprechaun into thinking they’re bangable. What new devilry is this? If it wasn’t for my open-mindedness and appreciation for all forms of macabre comedy and outrageously sick minded view on what is funny, I don’t know if I would even consider this a movie. But I do. And I will. The Leprechaun gets his in the end and his flute to control minds is restored. He even gets his own little rap in. With an ending to the Leprechaun series with number 5, this movie effectively killed off this mean little green baddie. But he went out with a strap and bang, all gangster like. So…. wasssgood?

Best. Pose. Ever.

I know this movie is bad. But for comedy I give it a 6.3 out of 10. Overall, 3.5 out of 10. But I’m biased. so watch it for yourself and post a comment on how badly you thought it was, or how racist my blog was. It’s all good in the hood.

AND GET THIS. There’s a second Leprechaun in the Hood movie! I’ll be back after I check this one out as well.

Cromartie High School: Not Your Typical High School

So I had watched this anime a while ago in my Anime Club. I instantly fell in love with it. Sadly, after only 6 episodes, our club decided to drop the anime due to its wild and erratic nature. The absurd comedy and spontaneous content appeared to be stupid and pointless to most. But I found the silver lining. More like gold mine. More than a year later, I sat down and watched the 26 episode, ten minutes per episode anime. In one day. And I loved every second of it.

Cromartie High School is the story of a bunch of badasses. These badass delinquents constantly fight for dominance as to who

Check out this group of badasses.

the true boss of all badasses is. And it’s a fight that’s never resolved. You can choose your own champion, but it’ll get you nowhere. These guys are stupid, impulsive, and nonsensical. They have no idea of the concept of normal or logical. And this is quite an endearing quality if I do say so myself. (Not in reality, mind you.) So this show comes down to a bunch of instances in the first year of a group of idiotic boys attending an unsupervised high school.

According to the anime, Takashi Kamiyama is the main character. After transferring to Cromartie, Takashi befriends Shinjiro Hayashida, a purple mohawk wearing badass. With this friendship, Takashi encounters the badasses around his school and embarks on a series of hijinks. And that’s not even the best part! Takashi isn’t even the main character! Some episodes don’t even include him. With a multitude of lowlifes and delinquents, this show has some interesting characters.

Is that? Yep. That's Freddy... Mercury?

Akira Maeda, a fellow member of Cromartie, constantly has his home invaded by his so called friends and other badasses from Cromartie. His hurt feelings and trashed house means nothing to anyone but he and his mother who appears to look exactly like him. Shinichi Mechazawa, a robot appearing robot, known as the biggest badass of Cromartie, refuses to fight and refuses to believe that he is a robot. The entity known as Freddie, is another badass, but more for his mute behaviors and the ability to ride a bucking bronco. With his strange resemblance to Freddie Mercury, this delinquent shouldn’t even be in school. But he makes up for it with his suspenders and bare chest. Gorilla, the gorilla. Anything else I should say about that? Yutaka Takenouchi, the leader of the Cromartie High School badasses, has motion sickness. Despite his attempts to keep his bossish facade in the forefront, his constant use of transportation threatens his credibility. Also making appearances are Takeshi Hokuto and his reluctant lackey known only as Hokuto’s Lackey, due to the fact that no one will allow him the time to tell them his name. Add rival schools with amazingly comedic leaders like Noboru Yamaguchi, the afro haired appreciator of true comedy, and you have one amazing show.

What makes this show even greater? The animation. There is next to none of it. Besides the traditional lip-flaps, characters rarely move. Cromartie High School

What.

Did I mention there was a live action movie?!?!?

consists of head shots mixed with color shooting star background indicating intense emotion and actions. The comedy comes entirely from what the characters say and the tiny absurd actions that occur in the background. It’s almost worth another watch because of all the hilarious things going on in the background.

What more is there to say about Cromartie High School? The content, the dialogue, the characters. It all adds up to comedic genius of the most absurd kind. This show isn’t really meant for everyone, so I wouldn’t highly recommend it. To the few who would appreciate a really weird, yet funny sort of comedy, then watch this for sure. 9.3 out of 10.