Tokyo Gore Gore and More Gore Police

I think I just appropriately changed the title. Because I was expecting gore, but not the magnitude I was given. I was relentlessly pounded with blood and carnage to such an excessive degree that I was in awe and stitches from all the laughing, at the same

Ah yes, the ever popular school girl…

time. This movie is satirically poking fun at the horror/gore genre, even putting gore in the title. It never takes itself too seriously (although some of the actors onscreen may have to deliver some of their lines with a straight face) and it has all the fun you’d ever want from a fantasy/anime/comedy/horror film (look at all those genres in a line…). I was fascinated and swept away by this Japanese wonder.

For as much of a plot as there is here goes nothing. Ruka (Eihi Shiina) is a member of he futuristic Japanese police force. In a similar situation to RoboCop, the police have been revamped with privatization. This is all in order to defeat

You love to see the woman from Audition in some hand rain… (That’s what it was tagged as…)

anime-like creature villains known as Engineers. Created by an evil mad scientist (Itsuji Itao), these Engineers have key-like tumors placed into their bodies (like a macabre Kingdom Hearts) that allow them to regrow injuries into gory and grotesque weapons. Ruka is a special member of the task force that is sent out to handle these demons with her always trusty katana. What a relief that swords are more effective against evil in the future than guns are…

After discovering an evil plot and a hidden past, Ruka must embrace who she is and destroy everyone in her path. This leads to a whole lotta ridiculous gore (basically things you can’t do to or with the

Slugma woman!

human body) and some of the funniest dismemberment scenes I’ve ever witnessed in a film. I was loving it and never wanting the blood spurts and cut in half bodies to stop (that’s a classic M for Mature anime scene for ya). This movie makes no real attempts to take itself seriously, and I was happy to see that. When you watch the scene in the Engineer bordello, you’ll know what I’m talking about.

Just all that gore…

This film is also interspersed with dark infomercials that pop up on the T.V.’s throughout the film. There’s proper swords for Hara-kiri (Japanese ritualistic suicide), mini-kawaii boxcutters for wristcutting (Kawaii meaning cute), and a whole lot of anti-suicide ads. I’m not sure what some of them were for, but maybe it just meant that suicide or mutilation leads to the creation of more Engineers? Strange…

This movie literally has some of the most messed up gore I’ve ever seen. Entering into a reality of warped body image, this movie can do what it wants. Anybody who is an Engineer can recreate themselves into a warped version of themselves with weapons of personality attached to themselves. A venus flytrap for legs, a

There’s no end to the weird.

katana arm, chainsaw on a chain… and my favorite I can’t mention that you’ll have to see to believe. I said before that A Serbian Film left me in awe and despair. This film had the same amount of disturbing scenes, but it was all done with a smile on its face. I like this one far better.

Yay!

Everything is over the top and there’s far more blood than you’d actually think can be in one human body. It’s all tongue in cheek with unrealistic corpses and bottles that can take your whole face off. This movie can’t even go a whole 5 minutes without another dismemberment. I loved every minute of it. It is truly one of those cult classics that ranks up there with Evil Dead in the way it’s presented. So if you like horror/gore movies like that, you have to see this. A big word up for Tokyo Gore Police. 9.1 out of 10.

Tucker & Dale vs Evil: A Hoot and a Holler!

After watching this movie and laughing along the way, I fell in love with it. Tucker & Dale vs Evil takes everything you know about Deliverance and Cabin Fever, Evil Dead and every slasher film you’ve ever seen, and turns it on its head. When I see a cabin, I think “Somebody’s gonna die in there.” When people see hillbillies, the first thought is, “Who’s gonna squeal like a pig?” But this movie says, “No, no, no. You’ve got it all wrong.”

The movie starts off with what you would typically expect. A whole group of college students on a road trip for some spring break madness in some backwoods cabin. All the weed, beer, and sex they could want (but somebody always gets left out of that situation. I’m talkin’ to you, kid with glasses in the back of the truck who just supplies the intelligent quips). From this interaction, we learn that Chad (Jesse Moss) is the

Just some good ole bloody fun.

headstrong and toolish leader of the crew, attempting and airheadedly failing at acquiring Allison (Katrina Bowden).

After a pit stop at a old timey convenience store, the college kids start to suspect something is up with the people around town. Most notably, their run in with Tucker (Alan Tudyk) and Dale (Tyler Labine). These two Southern hillbillies seem to have devious intentions, and just happen to be heading up to a cabin of their own that Tucker recently bought to fix up for beerin’ and fishin’.

Pretty sexy, right?

But then things go horribly wrong. Allison, while on a late night skinny dipping session, slips and bangs her head on a rock. Being the only ones near to save them while moonlight fishing, Tucker and Dale rescue her. What does this look like to the other college kids? Abduction, sexual assault, and a fish fry later on. Chad rallies the rest of the crew together to attack while Tucker and Dale recuperate Allison and show her just how kind they are. With their roles switched, Tucker and Dale must fight the evil that is a batch of city dwelling college kids who have seen waaaaayyyy too many horror films.

And it is simply that that made me love this movie. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen an original idea come across in a slasher style horror movie, but this is it. With its crossover genre of horror and comedy, it’s hard not to laugh when somebody willingly and accidentally jumps headfirst into a woodchipper. And not only that, but so many senseless deaths! It has to be a suicide pact, and it couldn’t be funnier.

I hadn’t seen Tyler Labine in many things at all, and it was refreshing to see a heavier set actor in a commanding role in a film. And someone with a beard no less! (He’s actually Canadian if anybody cares…) Alan Tudyk lends a hand with

This looks cliched, but it’s all good!

another spot on voice impersonations as he always does with his English accents. Rarely does he get to use his own voice… His comedy was lighthearted and just at the right times, coming from someone who thinks Alan Tudyk is just so so so under appreciated. I didn’t mind Katrina Bowden, but I’ve never watched 30 Rock so I can’t really say she was “spectacular”. She was attractive and played a good girl in peril. I rather did like Jesse Moss as the hero becomes the villain character, with his memorable voice from a few kids shows I used to watch and Final Destination 3. I actually remember him from that! And this movie must feel like more of the same to him.

Some of that hootin’ and hollerin’ I was referring to.

The gore was good, not too little and not too much. Just right. The cliched situations were perfect, and being a huge gigantic horror fan, I got all the references and scenes. Even the ten pin bowling at the end reminded me of Cabin Fever. Perfection in a can. To see a movie like this go under my radar for as long as it did was disappointing, but I always gotta hand it to Netflix for picking up the slack. So if you wanna see something truly original from a director (Eli Craig) out to prove himself, give your support and watch this film. It’s a true hoot with some great hooligans and shenanigans. A well deserved 9 out of 10 romp in the hay.