Leprechaun 5: In The Hood

I’m about to possibly sound racist from the very beginning of this blog post, but I found Leprechaun 5: In the Hood to be hilarious. I know its marketed as a horror comedy, but they should have more clearly defined it as a black horror comedy for black people. Or maybe more to the point that its a comedy that sensationalizes the thug life of black people in the 90’s. I really don’t know how to classify this movie myself. Let’s just get on with it…

This is a movie all about how three rappers got their lives turned upside down. They got in a fight with a leprechaun and their blind moms wasn’t spared. There’s a flute and some crazy ass-lines without care. There, rap schpeel over.  This movie attacks the African American street community from all angles. It is absolutely absurd. It doesn’t care what stereotypes it digs up. It makes stereotypes out of thin air. Who knew every damn black person who

Three posers.

picks up a flute can play a little diddy? I didn’t! And know I do! And the more you know the more you grow and that’s half the battle!

So this movie starts out with three true O.G.’s (original gangsters for the layperson) named Postmaster P. (Anthony Montgomery), Stray Bullet (Rashaan Nall), and Butch (Red Grant). Butch lays down all kinds of beats and is accused of being stupid and a virgin. Apparently, if you don’t have sex and you’re a young African American whippersnapper, everyone in your community will know about it. And that’s a damn fact. These guys destroyed their sound equipment because Butch and his ingenious thoughts told him to create a chemical factory on his turntables. Nice one there Mutumbo. In desperate need of cash to fulfill their dreams of rap stardom that will begin in Las Vegas, these three go out to case a joint.

That bat... came from his fro...

And who do they decide to knock over? Ice T, A.K.A., Mack Daddy O’Nassas. In an earlier scrape with the Leprechaun (Warwick Davis), O’Nassas found himself toe-to-toe with someone who could never truly play basketball. An Earl Boykins, if you will. With dope rhymes and insane powers to force your hands to drop any weapon, it seemed as if Ice T was doomed. And then, after going through a gun, knife, and mini baseball bat all stored in his afro, Ice T caught his break. A necklace that encases the Leprechaun in stone is launched onto his neck. Leaving him free to make his jive-ass famous, Ice T makes himself a rap mogul with his own recording label.

Davis hittin' that hard blunt.

Many years pass and the three young punks from the bad part of town show up and promote their fresh new look at rap. The positivity that comes with good thoughts and working together. But, in what I can only describe as ridiculousness, Ice T denies this positive turn on rap and says, “We have to rap about capping our homies in the face and smackin’ up a bitch and hoe.” As much as I do that in my daily life, what’s so wrong rapping positively? It may stop a bit of violence here or there. Some special commentary right there.

So the dope trio unleashes the beast and a wild goose chase ensues. O’Nassas is after their black asses (Geez, can I rap?) and the Leprechaun is hot on their tails like Southern Fried Molasses. Word. Can’t get enough? There’s more.

The Leprechaun's zombie hoes.

These three try to con some whack black pawn dealer named Jackie Dee (Dan Martin). This guy loves his biatches and that becomes the end of him. Any person these guys interact with have to bite the bullet. Even poor old Mr. Chang (throw some Asian racism in there for good measure). Postmaster’s blind mamma gets roped in and the best scene! The Leprechaun gets jiggy with a tranny. And bangs him/her to death? I think?!? It’s all kinds of insanity. And Butch wanted some of that beefcake…

Yes. The lines.

AND THE LINES. Oh, the lines. Every limerick spewed from Warwick Davis’s mouth is pure genius. Here’s a little taste/ad lib. Come here my sweet lass, sit on my lap. Let me look at you, before I give your sweet ass a tap. That made me lose it right there. I give props to Warwick Davis. For someone who went into this movie knowing he’d be hitting some fat blunts, rollin’ hard on some sad-ass thugs, and banging some strange hoes, he stone faced it like a champ. Even Ice T, strange actor and angry man that he is, must have known this could have been a career breaker if it hadn’t been pulled off comedically enough.

So all hell breaks loose, Leprechaun raises some beat ass zombie sluts from the beyond, and two masculine black gangsters dress up in drag, and somehow fool the Leprechaun into thinking they’re bangable. What new devilry is this? If it wasn’t for my open-mindedness and appreciation for all forms of macabre comedy and outrageously sick minded view on what is funny, I don’t know if I would even consider this a movie. But I do. And I will. The Leprechaun gets his in the end and his flute to control minds is restored. He even gets his own little rap in. With an ending to the Leprechaun series with number 5, this movie effectively killed off this mean little green baddie. But he went out with a strap and bang, all gangster like. So…. wasssgood?

Best. Pose. Ever.

I know this movie is bad. But for comedy I give it a 6.3 out of 10. Overall, 3.5 out of 10. But I’m biased. so watch it for yourself and post a comment on how badly you thought it was, or how racist my blog was. It’s all good in the hood.

AND GET THIS. There’s a second Leprechaun in the Hood movie! I’ll be back after I check this one out as well.

It’s Always Funny in Philadelphia

Okay, this review is a big deal to me. I love It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. A few years ago, out of the blue, I was watching FX and came across this man standing in front of a hot dog bar. This girl comes up from behind up and pinched him. His reaction? Turn around and punch a wench. Full fist, to the face. Needless to say, I rolled around on my floor and peed myself continuously for a full hour. Then, the show ended and it left my mind for a while. It’s Always Sunny left my radar for a few years. Then, just last year (as I’m finding most college students are discovering) it came back. My friend reminded my of that very scene and I had a repeat of 3 years ago. Again, needless to say, I went online and bought seasons 1-4.

And let me tell you, this show is good. Every episode is good. I wish I could forget this show over and over so every time I watch it is just as funny as the first time I witnessed it. I love showing this show to my friends, and that’s just what I did for my lucky friend Ian right before I decided to review it. We spent many a night watching 3 or 4 episodes at a time, laughing until our beds ran wet with urine. That’s how funny this show is.

Basic plot/premise: Dennis and Sweet Dee, Mac, and Charlie run this terrible bar in south Philly. They get little to no foot traffic in there, leaving lots of time for shenanigans and terrible screw ups. This guys are offensive in every way possible. The first episode of the show deals with just how ignorantly racist “The Gang” truly is. It’s fantastic. These guys are not afraid to go there.

Now, usually everybody picks a favorite character. (Let me know who yours is and why. Classic.) My favorite is Mac. Muscles and yet intelligent, Rob

"The Gang"

McElhenney creates and writes this show, giving the meat and potatoes for which everyone else works with. He is quite the genius in my opinion. Then there’s Dennis. The conceited, egotistical, narcissist who brings looks and carelessness to the table. His lines are great and his witticisms supreme. There are not many characters on modern T.V. or otherwise who compare to either Mac or Dennis. Glenn Howerton is quite the man.

That’s not to say that Sweet Dee (Kaitlin Olson) and Charlie (Charlie Day) are not great character.

Charlie before the inspiration of Day Man

Charlie is consistently hilarious as the wild card who is basically a retard. His illiteracy and horrible way of living always spice up life. And yes, even Sweet Dee brings her own ridiculed “useless girl” identity into play for some of the best burns ever laid on a human being.

Interesting note. Shortly after the first season aired, Danny Devito’s children (grandchildren) approached him about Always Sunny. They told him they loved the show and that they really think he should get involved with it. And get involved with it he did. As Dennis and Dee’s father, Frank Reynolds is quite the angry, business-oriented character. His obsession with Vietnam and Rambo is just to good to be true. (Also the Cuckoo’s Nest reference episode can’t be beat.)

But yeah, these guys get into all kinds of a hootinanny. They get racist, patriotic, Invincible (New Kids on the Block guy), America, extreme, you name it, as long as it’s offensive, they’ve done it. The cast works so well

Yeah, it's that good.

together (watch the Gas Crisis episode) and their chemistry is unstoppable. I really hope this show never quits. It’s quite excellent. I plan on buying the fifth season and reviewing it as well, but you know, being a college student, I’m hard up on funds. (Someone buy it for me?) I haven’t really caught any of the sixth season, but it’s on my to do. I don’t really have a lot else to say, it’s just something you have to experience for yourself. 10 out of 10.

Oh, and here’s that scene I was talking about. Let me know if you pee your pants.